Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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