if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
this hospital has no fireball
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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