the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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