I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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