dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm gonna fight the coyote
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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