the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
