Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
