i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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