i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
