I think I just saw someone hide a body.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Randomize
