at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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