Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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