i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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