can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
