you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
