Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
