sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
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