we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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