thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
