My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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