Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
