I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
