I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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