wat bout pragnant strippers??
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
