That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
