I think I am morally bankrupt
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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