i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
