I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
