I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
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