so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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