Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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