buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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