At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
