He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
