I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
