i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
