so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Even my vagina gasped.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
