I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
My vagina is very pro this idea
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize