are you still at the devil's house?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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