she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Randomize
