its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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