Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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