Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize