be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
