I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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