C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
