im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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