my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
