ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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