take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
